SevenQuestions: Robert Niles, he knows his numbers

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Seven Questions

15 Aug. 1998

Robert Niles is the man in charge of the online edition of The Rocky Mountain News. He also has one of the finest personal Web sites for journalists who can't do their math.

1 How is living near the mountains different from living in the flatlands? Back to the 7Q index

I've found that the flatter, more isolated and generally nondescript a town is, the more inflated its residents' sense of self-importance.
Living next to the mountains, you know that you and all your problems are ultimately insignificant, so why not enjoy life?

2 Whom would you most like to be stranded with in a remote mountain cabin?

The President of the United States. I'd be rescued by nightfall.

3 Do you know what E equals MC squared means, without looking it up?

Energy equals mass times the square of the speed of light. Meaning, basically, that it takes an enormous amount of your energy to get your VP of Business Operations to move the tiny mass of his pen across your mission-critical budget request.

4 What's the most aggravating thing about being in charge of a newspaper Web site?

Those bastards on Wall Street who overvalue every Internet-related IPO by, like, 10,000 percent. Which makes everyone think that since we're on the 'net, too, we're worth so much that we can afford to give away advertising for free.

5 Which book would you reread if you ever got the time?

"Native Tongue" by Carl Hiaasen. I used to work at Disney World. (If you've read the book, you'll understand.)

6 Can you describe any incident which convinces you people start going crazy at higher altitudes?

Have you ever watched "South Park?" It ain't fiction, folks.

7 If you could teach Bill Clinton one thing, what would it be?

Put back Tricky Dick's tape machine. And add video. If Jerry Springer can sell outtakes from his show at $19.95 a pop, imagine how many legal bills you could pay off with the "The Oval Office... After Dark." You've gotta think about your future, man.

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Copyright 1998, Thomas L. Mangan >Back to new SevenQuestions
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		15 Aug. 1998
Robert Niles is the man in charge of the online edition of The Rocky Mountain News. He also has one of the finest personal Web sites for journalists who can't do their math.
1	How is living near the mountains different from living in the flatlands?	Back to the 7Q index
	I've found that the flatter, more isolated and generally nondescript a town is, the more inflated its residents' sense of self-importance. Living next to the mountains, you know that you and all your problems are ultimately insignificant, so why not enjoy life?
2	Whom would you most like to be stranded with in a remote mountain cabin?
	The President of the United States. I'd be rescued by nightfall.
3	Do you know what E equals MC squared means, without looking it up?
	Energy equals mass times the square of the speed of light. Meaning, basically, that it takes an enormous amount of your energy to get your VP of Business Operations to move the tiny mass of his pen across your mission-critical budget request.
4	What's the most aggravating thing about being in charge of a newspaper Web site?
	Those bastards on Wall Street who overvalue every Internet-related IPO by, like, 10,000 percent. Which makes everyone think that since we're on the 'net, too, we're worth so much that we can afford to give away advertising for free.
5	Which book would you reread if you ever got the time?
	"Native Tongue" by Carl Hiaasen. I used to work at Disney World. (If you've read the book, you'll understand.)
6	Can you describe any incident which convinces you people start going crazy at higher altitudes?
	Have you ever watched "South Park?" It ain't fiction, folks.
7	If you could teach Bill Clinton one thing, what would it be?
	Put back Tricky Dick's tape machine. And add video. If Jerry Springer can sell outtakes from his show at $19.95 a pop, imagine how many legal bills you could pay off with the "The Oval Office... After Dark." You've gotta think about your future, man.
Back to SQ index Copyright 1998, Thomas L. Mangan		>Back to new SevenQuestions main page